Zen, and the art of calmness.

There have been several times in my life that I have had weight loss well in hand. Everything seemed to be going well, I knew what to do, I loved the idea of doing it, and life was good.

I want that. So very badly.

I am struggling getting there, however. I did a pretty good workout on Saturday - didn't push it too hard, but got some sweat going. I ended up doing 3 miles on a treadmill, with a healthy mix of walking/jogging. More walking that jogging right now, but it was there.

As of yesterday, my knee hurts. Makes me want to quote Yosemite Sam for a while.

I know why this is. When I started working with the trainer, she gave me some exercises to do to strengthen the muscles around my knee. That made walking/running way more comfortable, and I was way less prone to injury.

Have I been doing that? Nope.

Do I need to? Yep.

Maybe the exercises need to be a part of the "must do" daily. At least for a while...

Food continues to be a struggle. I know what I should eat, but there is something in my brain that is craving things I should NOT be eating. I know that this is a dopamine thing. I know that I'm basically an addict, just that my craving is for food, not for heroin. And yet...do I do anything about it?

I continue to mull things over. Which, I have just realized today, appears to be code for "delaying and denying the truth." I need to make changes. And I can't delay any further. Any more mulling, thinking, pondering, or ruminating, needs to be done AFTER starting my change. This means that I will likely have to continue to tweak and change what I'm doing. But for now, a "pretty close" plan is way better than no plan at all.

As of right now, I commit to the following:

1. By the end of today, May 11, 2015, I will have my short list of things that MUST be complied with every day.
2. This list will be adhered to starting Tuesday, May 12, 2015.
3. I will post daily accountability about the list that I commit to.
4. Before the end of day on May 18, 2015, I will have my blog layout updated to reflect the list of daily adherence.

This has to be done. If this is not done, then I am going to continue on the path upon which I find myself. And I don't like the destination.

So...look back later today for my list.

It's time.

-Silas