OK - full disclosure - I am struggling not to eat any carbs. But I'm winning that struggle. That one I can live with.
The struggle that is causing problems right now is internal.
I've lost a lot of weight, and been down to goal. Twice now.
There was a day, after losing all of the weight the first time, that a friend came up to me and asked how I did it. (He's a Physical Therapist, and very much into health). When I told him it was a combination of eating less and moving more, he told me that he wished everyone would do that, instead of <insert anything here>. Then he told me about his wife's comment - that she had noticed how much weight I had lost. It made me feel good.
During the second weight loss, after about 40 pounds, another friend came up to me and asked if I had lost weight. It was rather gratifying. I told him that yes, and that I had joined a weight loss competition. It was another good moment, made me realized that I was getting results.
It's remembering times like those that make me not want to be around those people anymore. Whether or not it's true, I feel as if they are judging me. They noticed the weight loss, what makes me think that they won't notice the weight gain? It's not like it was a subtle gain.
I have to keep reminding myself that I am where I am - and I can do absolutely nothing more than to make today a good day. All I can do is right now. I can choose what I eat. I can choose to move. I can make the correct choices. Eventually all of the other stuff (the actual numbers) will sort itself out.
Still...there's always the voice in the back of my mind...
Shut up voice. I'm busy living right now.